Еще подборочка с funnyoneliners@twitter:

My kids are growing up. Now instead of asking me where they came from, they refuse to tell me where they're going.

Это вообще.

I used to be a people person but the restraining orders took that away from me.


I set my Sleep Number bed to Windows 7. Now my bed has bugs and no support whatsoever.
в точку!

I can never wait on line at a bank without resisting the urge to yell EVERYBODY GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR.
есть такое xD

The only time it's cool to yell "I have diarrhea!" is when you're playing Scrabble.

=>> twitter.com/funnyoneliners